2 posts tagged “new york city”

Harvey Walnuts - Spent $12 a day on walnuts to feed the Stuyvesant Town squirrels.  "I used to take my ex - wife out to dinner three times a week," he said, "this is a lot cheaper than that or going on a date." 

One-Eyed Rob - Crazy and sad Rob always looked with his one good eye for someone to have a deep conversation about nothing with.  Recently purchased a Ginsu knife, but never got to use it since he left it at Walgreens when picking up his estrogen cream. 

feLINDA - Linda, a one time rock n' roll groupie, overcame her severe allergies to cats so she could pursue her passion as an at-home feline caretaker.   Nothing stopped her, not even the 2003 Blackout. 

Wall Street Charlie - Lived in the apartment above Linda and supposedly bangs things on purpose.

The Sometime Hindu - Mohinder sometimes indulged in a juicy hamburger at Dynasty Diner.

Dynasty Restaurant - Customers raved about their decaf coffee, but here's the secret... it's not decaf.  Open 24 hours except from Sunday.  Everything there is good and cheap. 

The Dynasty Duchesses - Every morning was Gay Pride Parade and if you were a good looking man they'd ask for more than your order.

Ma Bell - She drank at the Cove, but died on the corner when she hit her head on the curb.    The had a disco themed memorial for her at the bar. 

Tiger - The Cat that lived in 6F.  He wonder around the neighborhood and then wait around until someone took up in the elevator. 

NY news is nuts,.  Guy with TB drug resistant strain quarantined in UES hospital, hip hookahs, murder, poisonous soil - all reported so fast.  It's horrifying, ridiculous and hysterical.  The most interesting story - UWS movie theater  now offers a device that will alert  managers of the  disturbances - load mouth fools who talk on their cellphones.   However, this power is only for "selected people" - those who pay extra.  Luckily I don't have to pay for the machine since I don't have a problem to tell these fools to shut up.  I once did this at movies in Hawaii and scared the guy to death.  I even did it with Aloha.  I just hope that in some crazy twist that I don't wind up being buzzed.    

The Next Story was on breaking up over text. and a new book "The Joy of Text," (fuck why didn't I think of that?   The Sex and the City post it has evolved).   Lydia Bacquerra strongly advises, to BE CLEAR and to proof before you send.  Lydia's young and new but god Chuck, Sue, Len have all gotten so old.  It's weird to grow up with people reading you the news. My house watched Live at Five on NBC, but I noticed that Missy and Amy watched ABC - what's it like without Bill Beutel?   No doubt today my favorite is NY1 with Pat Kiernan in the morning - all NYC all the time and he even gives you a synopsis of the leading stories in the local papers.  

I forgot how I used to love the news.  International, not so much these days.  Too depressing and I feel like they are lying to me.  There are too many city stories that are too good  to make up.   I wished they made shit up for the Hawaiian newscast. I couldn't even watch it.  Pancaked pedestrians in the cross walk are very sad but they aren't exciting enough to stop the clicker.  It was nice living where fucked up horrible things didn't happened on a daily basis.  I got to like only opening the Advertiser because it had two crossword puzzles (it really doesn't get any better than the Monday puzzles, coffee, a lot of time and some beach).  Today even with only the Times puzzle and no beach it was pretty damn good cuz I was eating an everything bagel with scallion cream cheese and a slice of tomato.  This was after gentle yoga that I took along with the moms.  It was weird to be the youngest and the only one not enjoying the wonders of motherhood.  This, after spending Memorial Day weekend at Amy's house with the triplets, is one joy I can do without.    Holy fuck three three month olds.  It twas all baby all the time.  The only way to recover from so much trauma was to buy three dresses at Loehmann's.   I've been battling my way through the racks of all the discount designer stores like a good Jewish girl and just getting bargains left and right.  My mother was kvel'n (beaming with pride).  You should see the shoes I got at Century, but they are super high and I punctured a hole in the new special mat in my mom's new home gym while breaking them in.  The best part was that I did it while standing in front of both of them so I didn't even have to lie or anything.  Obviously I am now only allowed to wear them in carpeted rooms.  The wood floors are off limits since the heel might dent them.  You know that's what happen to Lynda Levine and she ruined her whole kitchen floor.  This s among the many interesting tidbits I've learned in the past week living with my parents.  Actually it's not bad living here.  Full fridge, laundry, on demand Weeds on showtime and even a home gym.  That's right I'm Livin' La Viva Loca.  I really felt the heart pumping excitement of my life during the final scenes of Law and Order: SVU.  As always it was powerful television, but tonight opened up a whole new story plot between Olivia and Stabler.  Anything can happen.  

THINGS I GOOGLED TODAY -
http://www.yiddishdictionaryonline.com/
http://www.ny1.com
http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/wri/339953230.html (jobs)
http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/wri/337374264.html
Jully Kang
Ebay
Loehmann's in New Jersey and directions
BOH
Westfield Yoga
Apple Bluetooth and RAZR v3 (fuckers won't discover each other)
Greenlee All My Children and Sabine (S take me to the Daytime Emmy Awards!)
Injury of Hamstring at Origin (Amy diagnosed it.  It seems I've aggravated an old stripper injury in yoga the other day.  Is it very zen if I ignore the pain by popping a vicodin before my yoga practice?  Maybe I should Google it?)